Saturday, January 22, 2011

My stint as a surrogate (yes, you read that correctly)

I've decided to become a surrogate. What?! You say. Has she had a uterus replacement surgery or some other wild treatment? And, why oh why is she being a surrogate for someone else instead of carrying a baby for her self?

Well, friends. It's because I have just become an alcohol surrogate for a friend who is pregnant. My warped or funny sense of humor (depending on how you see it) thought of this earlier this week. Two of my girlfriends and I meet for what are usually called Winey Wednesdays once a month and we split a bottle of wine (at a great restaurant that has them 50% off those nights). Anyway, since she can't drink, I designated myself as her alcohol surrogate.

I'm not a lush by any stretch of the imagination. One frozen margarita at our favorite cheap Mexican restaurant usually has me out and drooling on the couch by 8:30. But, I will sacrifice my body for her and any time she she wants a glass of wine, she can call me and I'll happily partake on her behalf.

I'd also be happy to become a surrogate of other things for pregnant people: a sushi surrogate, soft cheese surrogate, coffee/caffeine surrogate, deli meat surrogate (though I really only like turkey), and a flying in your last trimester surrogate (depending on where you want to go)...

I draw the line at becoming someone's litter box cleaner surrogate though.
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12 comments:

  1. JenniferJanuary 22, 2011 at 9:42 AM

    Hilarious, Lulu!!! See you in a few hours.

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  2. M3MUJanuary 23, 2011 at 1:30 PM

    AWESOME. :) I love this post. Hahaha.

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  3. KellyJanuary 23, 2011 at 7:01 PM

    Perfect! I love this! Makes me kind of wish I had pregnant friends so I can bring this idea up to them! lol

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  4. Krissi McVickerJanuary 23, 2011 at 8:42 PM

    This is so funny! I haven't heard of your book until now! I just added it to my virtual bookshelf! Happy ICLW! (#110)

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  5. RebeccaJanuary 24, 2011 at 12:26 PM

    LOL. Love it! A great plan!

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  6. RachJanuary 24, 2011 at 12:39 PM

    Well I guess I have been a surrogate in the past also! Great post, lol.

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  7. LilyJanuary 24, 2011 at 5:48 PM

    Oh my, that is hysterical! I will also be willing to sacrifice myself for surrogate services - particularly if someone needs a nap on their behalf!

    We need to look at schedules sometimes soon! :)

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  8. apluseffortJanuary 24, 2011 at 9:12 PM

    Thanks for the comment on my blog. I love this post and hereby volunteer to be someone's soft cheese surrogate (wine too, but mostly I love cheese)!

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  9. AnonymousJanuary 25, 2011 at 5:03 AM

    This is nothing but pure genious!!!!! I must be a silent surrogate for millions! I hope we get recognised one day. My current blog post is mainly about this subject and i'm so glad Im not alone! Chars to us!

    As a pregnant Pink says 'Raise your Glass'!

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  10. MarybethJanuary 25, 2011 at 9:32 AM

    hey that's how I need to look at it! I'm not drinking for myself I'm being a surrogate for someone else. LOL
    ICLW #109

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  11. JennyJanuary 26, 2011 at 12:35 AM

    Lol! So...would you consider coming to be my 'lifing heavy things' surrogate as we pack up to move houes? Oh wait...I'm not pregnant. Darn. But really - what a great reason to indulge - 'it's not for me, it's for my pregnant friends!'

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  12. AnonymousFebruary 3, 2011 at 3:27 PM

    I love this! I'm signing up to be a cheese surrogate if I can get someone else to be my diet and exercise surrogate. :-) If only.

    Thanks for the laugh!

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