Sunday, June 20, 2010

Faux Father's Day

When I wrote about Mother's Day last month, I was a little bitter. It's definitely one of those holidays that surround every part of your life. Luckily, the Chinese don't have Father's Day, so it's not in our face as much, but I'm feeling a bit resentful about Father's Day for Jack Bauer.

There is no question that he is a dad - in the way he talks about Nate, in the way that he has hopes and dreams for him, and in the way he longs for the day when he can teach Nate his "shopping cart" or "lawn mower" dance moves.

On this day last year, our gestational carrier was implanted with our last two embryos, and we were hoping that Father's Day 2010 would be one filled with twins and Nate at home. Well, that didn't exactly work out as we had hoped or planned.

Still, I'd like to re-post some of what I wrote about Jack from last year:

I think you can tell a lot about how a guy would act as a dad by watching him interact with your pets. Jack makes up funny songs about the dog and cats (usually it’s a Journey or Bon Jovi song with new lyrics), cleans up cat vomit (usually after he found it with his bare foot), beams with pride when the dog learns a new trick or doesn’t eat her own poo, breaks up fights, and pets, plays and loves on them several times a day. If that’s not a daddy waiting to happen, I don’t know who is.

So, I'm not sure that it will be a happy father's day for Jack, but every day will be father's day once we get our little boy home.

Happy Father's Day to my own wonderful dad, as well as the other dads out there - bio dads, adoptive dads, and hopeful dads.


  1. I really hope Jack manages to properly father Nate soon. What is the latest on bringing Nate over?

  2. Hi Lu! Remember me from Lily's e-class? I love your description about watching our husbands with our pets. It think it might be safe to say that it was watching my lover with his/our first dog led me to know that he was the man I wanted to spend my life with. He is always talking about making sure that our pets don't have any unmet needs. He is so attentive and loving, and I know that he will be an amazing father someday.

    I wrote a post last week about being caught off guard at Target when I discovered the cards - "to my husband on fathers day". I actually bought one, and need to get it ready to give him tonight. It is so reassuring to know that this day is hard for others too.

  3. Hello from a fellow infertile/adoptive-Mommy-to-be! I feel your pain on the Father's Day front. I'm so sorry you've been waiting an eternity for your baby boy to come home. I can't even imagine. Sending a big hug your way!